winged.

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It's raining.

It's 35 degrees outside.

It's snowing everywhere above 1200 ft.

I'm listening to my mp3s. It's warm in my room. My chair's comfortable. I'm comfortable. It's a good night to stay up late.

Even if I have to be up in 4 hours, and have yet to sleep.

I had a bizarre dream last night. Actually, this morning. Actually, it was probably noon when I had this dream, but I had yet to rise from bed. At any rate, it was strange. It had to do with me trying to play mp3s, only all I managed to play was a recording of people having sex. Loudly.

No matter which mp3 I tried, it'd be moaning.

A coupla nights ago, I had a dream that my jaw was stuck. I couldn't open it all the way, and I couldn't close it either. It was a very disturbing dream. Finally I crunched it closed, and it felt like I shattered my teeth in the back. There were little pieces of tooth-shrapnel crunching, and there was the feeling of bloodbubbles bursting under the teeth. It was quite disgusting.

I opened my mouth, and half of my teeth fell out. While I was trying to put those back in (no blood this time, oddly), the rest fell out. So I put them all in, like a old man's dentures, and shut my mouth to keep them in. I was just worrying about how I'd go through life without teeth when I woke up.

The scary thing is I swear I've had this dream before--not the teeth falling out bit, but the stuck-jaw bit.

I didn't mean to rant about bad dreams, by the way.

It's really raining hard outside.

It's inspirational, the rain. There's something inherently right about writing when you can hear and see the rain outside. I like the way rain drums on the roof. I like how you can hear it dribbling down the raingutter pipes. I like how it snakes down the windowpane, and how outside everything's gleaming and wet.

I really like how streetlight reflects on the asphalt in the rain. And the way curtains of rain billow in the sky.

I'm a little tired...

I'm listening to a song called Indulge Me by Olive. A friend of mine told me to DL it. It's very...cool. Sensual. I think it could be a little slower, personally, because with the subtle throbbing beat it's got, it's really got the potential for being a chill-out type of song.

By that I mean a song you can stretch back and close your eyes and groove to.

Really, though, this song has that sort of potential. But it's a little too fast, which makes it more the dancing type of song. It has one HELL of a provocative beginning.

It sounds like glints of moonlight off of moving skin. When you see just flashes, hints of the curve of a shoulder, the length of a bare thigh, the dip of the spine at the small of a girl's back. Someone else's hand there, the arm curling around the waist, the fingers splayed over the skin. And slowly rolling movement, so the light shifts and cants and changes. When it's so detached and ghostly in the dark that it's not like you're looking at someone's body anymore; it's like a landscape of skin, or a seascape, always moving.

And shadows, hints of shuddering kisses...

There's a line in it--

Indulge me please/I'll take the breath you breathe

--that's awfully suggestive without really saying anything at all.

The woman who's singing, she has a very clear sort of voice, almost (but not quite) innocent. The song itself is slow and throbbing and...achy. It sounds like sex at first, but then it starts sounding like the sea on a quiet night. Always moonlight, though. Something about the song just whispers about the moon.

I'm starting to yawn...

I think there should be a planet out there that's nothing but liquid. The creatures that live there will be liquid, too. Sentient, capricious, everchanging whirlpool-beings. Currents. Living waves.

And the whole planet will be alive, too. You'd know this because of the way the tides will rise and fall.

What is it about rhythms that's inherently natural to the human mind? We just seem to like rhythms. The tide is calming. The falling rain is soothing. The phases of the moon, the swaying of a swing, the repeating clatter of train wheels over the tracks. The rocking of a cradle, making love. Music. Dance. Breath. Heartbeat.

I want to soar...

I want to have wings like the eagles.

I want to watch a thunderstorm from above. I want to dance in the falling snow without touching the ground. I want to see the desert rushing beneath me from five thousand feet in the air. I want to kiss the moon and ride the wind.

I want to nest at the peak of the tallest mountain. I want to be some aerial eagle/man spirit. I want to have eyes like the eagle, golden and sharp, and tiny feathers in the place of hair. I want to have a piercing cry that shatters the silence like some javelin of freedom.

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